My most embarassing moment: It's a sign!

and still going... for the last 2 weeks, I barely had sleep trying to finish 2 portfolios and getting ready for my practical finals. It was tough... so tough... I broke down... IN CLASS while making my Genois!

I remember when I was 'younger' I would write on those slam books and not have anything for my 'most embarassing moment.'

Now I have one. Breaking down and crying... in class.

I cried not because I didn't know what to do, I cried because I was so tired from staying up all night, practially all week to finish my portfolio and prepare for my finals.

I cried because I was late for class on the day of the practical final and I let my chef instructor down.

I cried because I wasn't at my best.

I cried because my genois collapsed on me the last minute and I ended up with a thin dense unedible cake instead of a light spongy one.

I had to step out of the class. I had to breath.

I was embarassed. I've had worse professional experiences before. How come this one seems to hurt the most.

For a shor while, I began having doubts about my goals. Why do I even subject myself to this? It hurts so much, not to mention it's physically challenging.

And then it came to me... I wouldn't feel this way if I didn't care.

So I did care. In fact, I cared so much. It's a sign. I'm passionate about this. I was so concerned about doing well, it hurt when I failed.

It only means one thing. I'm on the right track. This is for me. I do want to be a chef. I want it so badly that it hurts.

I should be grateful for experiences like this. I'm being molded. I'm being taught.

God does have unique ways of getting His message across.